Perseverance

Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. ~ Hebrews 12:1

Do you ever wonder about how you can go through a rollercoaster of emotions throughout the day or even the week?  We've had one of those weeks.... 

A week ago today we were in a wreck that totalled our van.  All are without injury, and blessed to have been so protected.  We went to Galveston for the weekend, and would like to have stayed longer.  Spent Monday trying to work and get insurance details ironed out.  Picked up my rental, which is way bigger than my little 4'11" body was meant to drive!!

But while I ride that coaster, I realize that the underlying peace I've found never fails.  We started up at Life Group again on Tuesday after a long break over the holidays.  It was amazing to be with everyone that night.  We'd missed our dear friends, and we met new ones.  While we were there, the Holy Spirit ministered to one of my new friends through me.  It was a great experience to have the right words in the right time for her, and to know that it wasn't really me.  I've not experienced that often, so it was a great feeling leaving there knowing I had helped in some way. 

Last night I went with my new friend to a women's bible study.  It was only the 2nd meeting, and I was so blessed by the entire event.  I saw an old friend, and hoped he would see the new me.  I met new friends, and was able to share some things about my past with them and bring it in to the light.  I love that, you know.  Bringing it in to the light takes the power of shame and darkness away from it.  Jesus is awesome that way.

So of course today was not so great.  At least, it had more challenges than the previous two days.  But as I came around towards the end of the day I realized something.  Or possibly I just made a choice.  I can take each of these things one at a time.  There is no reason to become overwhelmed by life, or the little and not so little things in life.  I am not in control of any of it anyway, so why spin my wheels over and over trying to stay in control? 

I have to laugh at myself when I think of these things.  In my past life, control was all I knew.  My life consisted of winning and losing everything based on what I could or could not control.  My family, job, money, entertainment...  I had such a need to control everything!  Eventually, though, it became obvious that the more I tried to control, the more out of control my life became. 

So today I trust.  I trust my Father to handle all the things, large and small.  I look to Him for guidance, and to clean up when I mess up.  But overall, I persevere.  I move forward, one step at a time.  The peace I've found is just not worth losing... 

We realized while in Galveston that for so many years we went there to dream about moving away and starting over.  Planning and searching for something that was just out of our reach.  We know now that what we longed for, we have found and it is so much bigger and better than anything we imagined!

Tomorrow is Friday, and we have our grandbabies for the weekend.  We have church and a family get together Saturday and then serving at church on Sunday...  we persevere, we run the race at a steady pace and we hope to throw off all the things that hinder us in the mean time. 

Living the Blessed Life,

~ Jessica